June 3rd 2009

The other night a new friend and I were talking about our Faith Journeys when he asked, "Why do you like your church? What is it about *Mars Hill?" I had to stop and think. How do I summarize all that I feel and know about my church into a few words or phrases? Mars Hill feels like home, but it's not the Place that I love, it's the people and what I learn there and through them. I said, "At my church we talk a lot about living the Best Life Possible. We talk about Loving People and Loving God. We wrestle with what that means and looks like. We discuss The Third Way- for sometimes it seems that we have 2 options to solve a problem or a conflict, but often there is a Third Way and it involves Love." Not to mention my Community of Friends who walk My Story with me and I with them. They make me feel a little less crazy and show me what it means to really love and be generous.

My answer seemed simple yet I knew it was true. Those are the reasons I love Mars Hill. My love is not based on how I feel about sermons, worship songs, theology or decoration. It is based entirely on the fact that I am better for knowing people there and have learned how to love God more.

The next day I spent 7 hours working in my Garden. I thought about God, the Creation Story, how plants burst forth from seeds, and about my answer to the question, "Why do you like your church?" I wasn't sure if I answered well or if I had really touched on the heart of the matter.

Sunday I went to church.

Church started with singing and immediately I was smiling because the worship team was using a red, plastic Kazoo. Love it. Then later we sang a hymn from 1848, nice and slow, with the sounds of an organ. *Rob and Ed team taught on this passage and it was all I could do to stay in my seat without clapping and hollering. Acts 2:44-45, "All the believers were together and had everything in common. Selling their possessions and goods, they gave to anyone who had need."

Beautiful.

This was the early Christian church. It was a group of people who found a way for those who Have to give to those who Have Not. It's about community, sharing, loving and living together. They talked about leaping with Joy - meaning, those who have enough are so happy that they are literally leaping with Joy. They have the ability to Leap because their are no stones in their shoes (it's hard to walk with a pebble in your shoe). And then there are those among us who are Limping with the burden of having nothing. How can we share our Joy? While Ed explained this Rob was placing buckets around the stage. Then we heard this, "If you are leaping because you have enough and are paying your bills and have a little bit left over, you may come forward and give. If, however, you are limping because you have to choose between buying food or paying for medical bills, please come down, reach into the bucket and take what you need."

By now I am crying. Such leaky eyes.

Before Ed could really finish the invitation to give, people were already going forward and dropping money. I heard purses being unzipped and saw men reaching for their wallets. The stage was flooded with Generous Christians. After a few minutes Rob and Ed interrupted and said, "We see a lot of people giving and we thank you. But we know a lot of you are out there and you are hurting. Please. Please. Please, come forward and take what you need." Never in my life have I heard a pastor stand on stage and invite people to take money. They were begging people to take it. I saw a few people go forward and sheepishly reach in and count out a few bills. Ed said, "Some of you have taken a bit, please come around a 2nd time and take More." I was still sobbing from the sheer Joy of watching it all unfold.

June 3rd 2009

(This is my first post on the Burnside blog. The only parameters I was given when I was asked to be a contributor were these: "There are no real parameters, but we generally want to steer away from anything that's too long (as it's blog writing) and too self-referential." That said, I would like to mention how much I have enjoyed my time with you. I expect a cease and desist message in my inbox within the hour.)

Since November of last year, I have been a man without a title. That was actually a pretty liberating reality for a while. I enjoyed the mystery of “what’s next?” I enjoyed throwing a baseball to my son in the front yard at Two O’clock in the afternoon… on a Tuesday. And I felt very little shame when I was able to answer, “Now, what do you do for a living, again?” with, “a little this… a little that.”

More often than not, folks would furrow their brow or just stare blankly at the casual confidence with which I embraced having no timesheet. No boss. No real responsibility whatsoever. And no… income.

Sometimes people would say they were praying for me. Other times, they would offer encouragement, like, “Hang in there. You’ll find something,” or “Boy, this economy isn’t sparing any of us, is it?” Like I said, I kind of enjoyed my freedom, so I shrugged them off and placed their thoughts and prayers in the same bucket I use for Facebook Friend Requests from people I haven’t seen or thought about since Camp Centrifuge ’87.

I didn’t need them. I was fine.

And then something happened. It wasn’t a quiet nudge from the Holy Spirit or a lightning bolt-sign from the Creator. It was more like, “Holy crap! I’ve been unemployed for over 6 months!” Now, I can’t claim to be the only discoverer of this revelation, mind you. I have a wife. She helped.

But then I started panicking. And the panic turned to fear. And the fear turned to anger. And the anger turned to cheap whores and late night binging with a guy named Pablo in downtown Birmingham. OK, not really. But that would have made this a better story, for sure.

Anyway, the anger I was feeling was brought on because of my ridiculous sense of entitlement. “I’m a good guy… I love my family… I work(ed) hard… I never did anything wrong… I don’t deserve this… I’m closer to God than I have ever been…”

I am closer to God than I ever have been. I made that statement a while back and then followed it with: so that's why I am so frustrated with our situation. You know, I am going to Him all the time. I am in the Word. I am really leaning on His sovereignty to pull us through this... I am closer to Him than I ever have been and things still turn to crap on a daily basis.

The guy I was talking to during this emesis of “me, me, me” made a pretty awesome point (the jackass). He said, “I believe you. I think you probably are closer to Him than you ever have been. But let me ask you something... don't you think He loves that? Don't you think He wants that from you? God is a relational God and He wants nothing more than to be close to you. You believe that, right? (I said, yes). Well then why in the world do you think He would "bless" you and give you everything you think you need? Why do you think He'd risk losing you to all that crap you want so much? You just said you were closer to Him than you ever have been. Let that be enough! He's not done with you yet...”

Kick. To. Groin.

You know why I think I am unemployed? I don't mean to over-spiritualize the plight of "the least of these," but I'm pretty sure He’s not done with me yet. I'm not there yet. My reliance on and trust in Him is not enough for me to be trusted with "prosperity." That’s not to say that I shouldn't go after being the best "me" that I can be... It only means that I need to rest in the fact that the Creator of the Universe loves me enough to want to be close to me.

I don't think God is vengeful or does anything out of spite (frankly, He's got a lot of better things to do than poot around with our emotions), but I do believe that He allows "conflict" to help strengthen us and focus our goals and desires and intentions and ambitions on Him. I gotta tell you, to a guy who is seeing opportunity after opportunity to share my story and tell people about my (growing) family and write blog posts at the kitchen table... and play catch in the front yard with his son on a Tuesday afternoon… That's huge.

Somebody told me recently that I was being brave. I’m not. Bravery, to me, is jumping out of an airplane. I either fell out or got pushed out, and if you offered me a parachute I would absolutely take it. But at least I know I’m not falling alone.

June 2nd 2009

Dr. George R. Tiller, a high-profile abortion doctor who performed abortions late into the third trimester, was gunned down on Sunday while handing out bulletins in the foyer of his Wichita, Kansas church.

The suspect, Scott Roeder, is being described by the media, his acquaintances, and his family as an anti-abortion, anti-government zealot with a history of mental illness. According to the New York Times, someone identifying themselves as Scott Roeder posted a message on the website of Operation Rescue describing Tiller as a "concentration camp 'Mengele' of our day and he needs to be stopped before he and those who protect him bring judgement upon our nation." (Wichita-based Operation Rescue has released a couple statements condemning Roeder's actions as "deplorable" and stating their commitment to a peaceful and legal end to abortion.)

This event deserves a more thorough consideration than I can give it here today. Tiller's murder has caused me to reexamine my own commitment to peace and the protection of all life, from conception to natural death, and the ways in which my actions might undermine my principles.

One question I can't shake though, and I thought I would share it with you: Is Tiller's murder - as well as other recent acts of violence, such as the shooting in Knoxville last July (also at a church) by a suspect who seemed to pick his target because he "hated liberals in general as well as gays" - the logical outcome of the rhetoric of violence which has come to dominate so much of our national discussion? Put another way, should we be surprised that the language of the "culture war" might incite somebody to actually declare war?


Update: Here is a sample chapter from Larry Shallenberger's book Divine Intention which deals with Christians and the culture war.

June 2nd 2009

If you haven't played Rock Band, or Rock Band 2, you're missing out on one of the sublime gaming experiences this side of gunning down rival gangs in San Andreas.

If you've ever strummed an air guitar, beat a rhythm, or hummed in the shower, you need to get this game. But not yet.

In my opinion, band simulators won't reach their peak until you can play any song in your iTunes collection (technology will get there, I'm sure). But the Rock Band franchise is taking a major step forward on September 9, 2009. If you don't believe me, here's what may be the greatest animated commercial that has ever existed. (For a better look, go here.)

June 1st 2009

On Friday, The Weekly Standard ran a piece on Don Miller, calling him the post-modern prophet and "the Evangelical Left's poster boy," along with soggy host of other epithets.

"Miller's implied comfort with same-sex marriage and seeming apathy about pro-life causes would have upset one-time Religious Right icon Bill Bright, the late founder of Campus Crusade for Christ, the international college ministry that elevated Miller to best-selling author by distributing Blue Like Jazz to thousands of college freshmen. Bright, like other old-line evangelicals, might also have been discomfited with Miller's casual references to profanity, liquor, sexuality and marijuana in his spiritual odyssey."